The Art of Hostessing

My favorite essentials, tips, and treats for planning the perfect gathering

It probably seems counterintuitive to be an introvert who loves hosting, but it actually makes sense--at least to me! I love to be home. I get to curate who comes. I can control the vibe (lighting, music, etc)! And I love the more creative elements that come with hosting: planning out cocktails and menu items, setting the table, decorating! It’s become something I really enjoy.

(Just please, leave by nine!)

My number one piece of advice when throwing your own soiree? Do everything you can not to be stressed! (I say this as a person who easily gets stressed.) Your energy sets the tone for your guests. For me, that means lots of planning and preparation so that everything is done by the time people come over. It also means making my space as relaxing and inviting as possible. And when all else fails, a little "personality drink" beforehand!

Details from the collage above (clockwise from top left): Fferrone Mini Martini Glasses // Ginori Seashell Side Plates // Christofle Silver Egg + Tray // Deeda Blair Book // Wooden Serving Board // Pewter Martini Shaker (a gift from my realtor when I moved in--he had it engraved with my closing date!) // Krugg Magnum Ice Bucket

What to Wear:

I like to be really comfortable. A kaftan is fun (ofc!), but lately, I've been going more casual. An easy button-down. Kick flare pants (pick your poison: High Sport or Anthropologie). Hair pulled up in a cute claw or silk scrunchie. Satin slippers or pretty flats. I'm coveting these "opera glove" oven mitts (currently sold out but aren't they so fun!?). And fun jewelry of course (my go-to is always my Retrouvai lollipop ring!).

Also: look at these under $100 satin ballet flats. Beyond!

Set the Stage:

I always make sure that my cocktail station and a little snack are ready by the time my guests arrive. As I mentioned above, I do as much preparation as possible. I have friends who will still be cooking or chopping things up as guests arrive, and I admire how relaxed they are, but that's not me . . . I like to have everything as close to finished as possible, or I am stressed!

Cocktails:

I can't recommend investing in a big ice bucket enough. It took me over six months of stalking eBay, 1st Dibs, etc., but I finally found the Krug Double Magnum ice bucket (similar!) that I had been coveting--it was one of my holiday gifts to myself. I found mine on eBay but had made saved searches on Etsy, 1stDibs, and Chairish. My persistence paid off; I found it on eBay for a really good price. Etsy has so many gorgeous ice buckets, too--I absolutely love this one. Just get something big and pretty. It will be a happy home for beer, wine, mixers, etc.

Have everything on hand (a separate bucket for drinks ice), cut-up lemons, and limes), and a nice little DIY setup, which makes it very clear that your guests can fix their own drinks. OR, you can pre-batch a cocktail ahead of time (this blog post has some good ideas!) and have the cocktails ready as your guests arrive. Some of my tried and true faves: the Negroni during the cooler months or a Paloma in the summer! I personally find I get a little stressed if I am simultaneously greeting guests and making their drinks. My brain cannot handle both, and this all goes back to my number one rule (don't be stressed!).

In terms of what to serve, I always have a few different types of wine and some bubbles on ice . . . vodka, tequila, + club soda . . . beer . . . and something non-alcoholic. I am intrigued by this N/A aperitif. My favorite N/A drink right now is Ghia's strawberry orange blossom fizzy drink. If you are feeling a little spicy, serve something with THC. I love these seltzers from Anytime. (Use code GRACEATWOOD for 20% off)

Snacking, Etc.

Some favorite snacks + pretty little treats, clockwise from top left: Red embroidered cocktail napkins // Meredith Dairy Goat Cheese (we call it "Crack cheese" as it is so addictive) // Fiesta Sized Anchovies // Lusty Monk Mustard // Mexican Abalone Bottle Opener (what a stunner) Enamel Jewel Cocktail Picks // Silver Clamshell Dish // Mother of Pearl + Abalone Fish Sculpture // Tuna Belly in Yuzu Kosho // Hand-Carved Iberico Ham // Snacking olives trio

Just for Fun!

Some pretty green things I love, clockwise from top left: my favorite gold flatware // resin serving set // marbled water glasses // oval platter // arc elements plates (I have and love these, and they're finally back in stock. Each one is handmade so they go fast) // bonbon tumblers // marbled water pitcher // resin serving bowl // splatter dessert plates

Other Tips:

1. I didn't realize how inexpensive it is to hire a bartender to serve drinks. For gatherings of more than 8-10 people, hiring a bartender or having a college student on hand to pour wine and mix simple drinks makes things so much easier.

2. Flowers are a must for me. Whenever I host a larger gathering, flowers are the number one "extra" that I invest in. They make the space feel cozy and special (and if it's what you're going for, they look great on Instagram).

3. Lighting sets the mood! Candles, dimmed lamps, and twinkle lights are your best friends.

4. Don’t forget a playlist—something upbeat but not overpowering. Think a little jazz, a little indie, and a little classic. I am a massive fan of the Nancy Meyers Kitchen playlist on Spotify.

5. Remember these words: Always Have Extra. A spare bottle of wine, a few more place settings, and a backup snack never hurt.