A Fancy-Cozy State of Mind

Because cozy doesn’t have to mean frumpy.

absolutely unrelated to this post but my film photos from Cote d’Azure are sparking so much joy

I don’t know, guys. It’s been a week. I’ve had a bit of a head cold, waking up groggy and hungover (despite being “off the bottle” as my friend calls it). And then there is the news cycle. It is all just a lot. I have not been particularly productive. I open up Instagram and get such whiplash. Fashion week, a school shooting. A 911 Tribute, followed by AI video where two cats are podcasting. Charlie Kirk. We aren’t built for this. I am not advocating we bury our heads in the sand; there has to be a better way to consume the news.

What I am craving now is coziness at home, a few days away from Instagram, a long walk with a friend, a big pot of soup on the stove, a warm mug of tea . . . staying home with movies and/or a good book.

Tonight after work, I’m getting a massage. And then I will probably finish The Academy (the new Elin Hilderbrand, written with her daughter Shelby) tonight. It’s the perfect fall book, set at a New England boarding school with both students and teachers behaving badly. I decided to take a break from alcohol this month, except for my birthday and my best friend’s birthday. I am saying no to pretty much any brand dinner/panel/etc, just hunkering down and enjoying my house.

Today’s send is a little list of the best fancy-cozy things. Enjoy (and please, take care of your mental health!). Just writing this made my shoulders drop an inch.

1. Plan-free Friday nights. I love leaving Friday evening free if I can. For me, it’s the perfect way to decompress from the work week. Sometimes, I’ll book a massage right after work. Other times, I’ll do an at-home beauty night. I also let myself watch TV in bed (usually a no-no, just because TV in bed is so delicious that I would do it all the time if I didn’t set limits!).

2. Playing the Nancy Meyers’ Kitchen playlist pretty much constantly. The musical epitome of “cozy-fancy.” My other go-to is just asking Alexa to play Nina Simone.

3. Upping my bodycare game. The idea of an everything shower is nothing new; this is about what you do after your everything shower. I’ll apply my Cyklar glycolic acid spray, pat that on . . . then body lotion. Then, I’ll use my Esker Body Plane. Lastly, I’ll slather myself in body oil like a slippery little seal. After that? A big cozy terrycloth bathrobe (must be easy to wash, this one is!).

4. A special candle burning during unspecial moments. Like when I’m working, when no one else is around. Right now I have this one from Le Labo burning, but I just reupped Maison d'Etto Durban Jane.

5. Project Baking. There is nothing cozier than a baking project. Last year, I got really into making focaccia bread. This year, what will it be? I like to make something I can give to friends. I also want to recreate cafeteria pizza from the eighties, how fun does this look? (H/T to my friend Nick on this one.)

6. Soup, soup, and more soup. There should always be soup. My all-time favorite soup to make is the Oh She Glows vegan cream of tomato soup because it tastes like there’s real cream in it but it doesn’t make my stomach hurt.

7. Rothy’s new Cozy Clogs. I am a huge fan of their original clog and couldn’t be happier about this launch.

8. Movie night in > drinks out. But make it fancy! Don your best silk pajamas, serve a mocktail (or maybe a little THC seltzer, the lavender lemonade is so yummy, and GRACE15 gets you a discount), order in caviar (serve it with potato chips), and get your other favorite fancy snacks in the mix.

9. On the note of movies, work your way through the AFI 100 list. I did this for a while, but there were too many Westerns (not my favorite), so I quit. I think I’ve watched about 70? I loved everything that I watched but wasn’t going to force it!

10. It’s time to switch out our perfume for cozier, woodsy scents. I’m swapping out my fresh scents and lighter florals (bye for now, Orange Blossom!). I personally really love Maison d’Etto Durban Jane (same scent as I have a candle),

11. Winding down the day with a mini routine. If I don’t have plans after work, I do my skincare right at 6 or 7 and slip into pajamas. Pull on my coziest cashmere socks. Make a seltzer or mocktail in a fancy glass. Do bedroom turndown service (stole this from

    Emily Schuman
    ), which means dimming the bedroom lights, leaving a carafe of water by the bed for later, and turning down my sheets. That way, when I finish doing whatever I’m doing, I can get straight into bed. Have some water, take two of my favorite sleep gummies (use 15GRACE), read a bit, and go straight to bed.

12. A cozy book. We are working on a big fall reading guide for the blog, but as I mentioned, I am reading The Academy, and it’s perfect!

13. A cashmere bathrobe. Pure luxury (just not on body oil nights). There are so many nice ones out there, but I suggest this one from Garnet Hill as it’s washable, on sale, and in my experience, their cashmere is excellent quality, especially for the price. Unlike some other more affordable cashmere, their stuff really lasts!

14. Sunday correspondence. Set aside the afternoon to write handwritten notes on beautiful stationery. It could be a thank you note, a note to tell someone you admire them, or just a little snail mail catch-up. It feels old-world fancy and deeply cozy—some of my favorites: cool cats, wavy trim, a simple neon heart.

15. Fresh flowers everywhere! I am resourceful here, clipping palm fronds and flowers from my garden, but I also love making a trip to my favorite flower shop (it’s literally called Flower Shop!) here in Charleston. I’ll put them on the dining table, by the bed, in the bathroom, all over my living room . . . the best!

How to create a gallery wall that feels collected, not cluttered.

My review of Oak Essentials (a favorite brand for luxury bodycare).

Graphic lines for fall. A new favorite dress + a slew of other linnear pieces.

So sorry to say, this just wasn’t my favorite.

Over the weekend, I finished Heartwood, by Amity Gaige. I wanted to love this (the writing is incredible!), but ultimately it was just a little bit slower than I’d like and the subject matter wasn’t really for me (it’s about a female hiker in her forties who gets lost on the Appalachian Trail). It’s a slow-burning thriller, and I think that someone more outdoorsy than me would really love it. Just not my favorite, but I can 100% see why it’s been so popular. Order on Bookshop or Amazon.

Next up? The Academy! I am really enjoying it. More on that next week.